I was able to do over 50 approaches this week, but my results seriously declined the more I did. At first I thought it was just coincidence and I was a bit lucky at the start of the week, and there might be a little bit of truth to that, but I’m sure the major reason is my vibe went down.
In my first 12 approaches of this week I got 4 phone numbers and 2 instant dates. And then that was it, not a single phone number for the next 38 approaches. It must have been my vibe.
When the Goal Ruins the Journey
I was on a mission to do a lot of approaches as I want to reach my goal of 1000 approaches, but it almost feels like cheating myself if I am just forcing myself and going through the motions and getting zero results. I think there is a difference from forcing myself when I am scared but really want to approach, to forcing myself when I really can’t be bothered and am doing it like a project that has to be done rather than a desire to connect with another human being.
The problem is I’m not really sure what to do about this issue. I have heard a lot about “state” but it doesn’t seem as relevant to me. In fact quite the opposite, my first few sets of the day are often my best. I feel like a character in a computer game that has a certain amount of “power” and the more approaches I do the more this power drains. So far the only way I have been able to get this power restored is by having a complete break from daygame.
Rejection or Just Peopled Out
I used to think it was the pile up of rejections that drain this power, but now I suspect it is just interactions with people I haven’t met before, especially women. I am highly introverted and I think this takes it’s toll.
A possible solution could be to break the daygame session up and have a half time break; go to the library and listen to a meditation mp3 for 30 minutes, or even just read a book or watch some TV, but I think this is more of a short-term boost, and is more “vibe management”. If I go and rest for 30 minutes before I get tired I might be able to get more approaches done before my power drains.
But I think to reset my power to full again I need a change of scenery; some time on my own, some time with family, and some time with friends. Each of these nourishes my soul in different ways.
Change of Scenery
To get a change of scenery I can get out to my warehouse in Redcliffe and getting into work and a walk along the beach. My warehouse has a small self-contained bedroom and kitchen so it’s just me and I don’t need to speak to another human. The introvert in me loves this and needs it to recover.
But on my own for too long I get depressed and need some family and friends, so up to visit my kids and their mum a couple hours north and stay there a couple nights.
Lastly, some male bonding. I have friends on the Sunshine Coast that meet once a week for dinner so can do that on the way back to Brisbane. Even though I have friends in Brisbane it’s not quite the same as my Sunshine Coast friends I have known for over 10 years and we know each other really well, there is no effort to communication and so much history to draw on.
The work and the kids are commitments I want/have to fulfill so I have to do these things anyway, it’s just great that I am able to integrate it all into my “daygame recovery”