I started a spreadsheet after my first 500 approaches in April 2016. My main goal was to keep track of how may approaches I did, but there is a lot of other data I can get out of it and most importantly track my progress. For example, from April to July I did about 450 approaches, my open to number ratio was 7.23 and my open to date ratio was 46.3 and one lay.
From August to November I did about 339 approaches, my open to number ratio was 5.1 and my open to date ratio was 33.9, and 1 lay.
So while I am still not getting the lays I want, I can see my progress in getting the dates. My expectation around getting laid is having sex with half of the girls I get out on a date, however I would happily settle for 1/3. Assuming I can get my open to date ratio down to 30 and get my 1/3 f close on these dates then that’s one lay in 90 approaches. By PUA standards this is terrible, but for an average looking at guy at 41 years old then this means fucking a new 20 something every month. I would take that in a heartbeat.
Without getting too technical and nerdy, haha too late, what this extrapolates to, on a conservative estimate, if I factor in most dates averaging a second date and most lays averaging fucking the girl twice more, I get 6 dates per month and three lays. Considering I already have one Fbuddy, and the strong possibility of adding another two, then that could get it up to 10 lays a month with 3-4 girls. On average one would fall off every 2-3 months and one would get added. That is the abundance I started doing this for and the numbers show me it’s a realistic future reality. I know life never works on averages and some weeks/months I will have abundance and some scarcity, but that is also the roller-coaster of life I signed up for.
I have recently added two columns to my daygame.xls spreadsheet. These are “time on street” and “time on dates”.
I have been putting some thought recently into what would be the most helpful metric to focus on for my dedication to daygame. In the beginning it was approach count. For the first 6 months of daygame I felt that if I did a certain amount of approaches I would get the exposure I needed to desensitize myself. I think overcoming approach anxiety and then the subsequent nervousness in set was overcome by repetition.
After 1000 approaches these were reduced to a point where they are no longer much of an issue. The AA is hardly present when I approach a girl that I feel is within my ping range (honestly see myself dating without feeling awkward) and any nervousness in set is probably a redeeming character so I don’t appear to smooth.
Now I am thinking that time on the streets whether I approached or not was going to be an equally if not more beneficial measure of dedication and commitment which I have discerned as my number one goal. There is the caveat here that I can’t use this as a weasel and tell myself because I am in the field that I am doing what I need to without approaching. But I have proven to myself over and over again that if I relax and just stay out in the beautiful city I am in and let go of expectations things happen. I will bump into a wing and get a boost of energy, a girl will give me an IOI, or I will just see the perfect slow walking, dreamy tourist and opening just comes naturally without effort. More often than not this gives me some momentum and I have turned bad vibe days into good sarges.